from April 7, 1943 Harness Horse
Farmer I Would Be
When I was racin' horses
A few short years ago,
An truckin' round the country
To every pumpkin show,
Most every horseman that I'd meet
Was gonta quit the game
An buy himself a little farm,
An raise the golden grain.
They fold me farmers had a snap
It was an easy life.
You coined the money right and left
You never had no strife.
No shoein bills to bother
No truckin' bills or feed
No ridin' box cars all night long
A farmer's life they'd lead.
I sold my hoppled pacer
Her bike an harness too
I vowed I'd be a farmer
An make a fortune too
I bought myself a muley cow
A seeder an a hoe
A bunch of hens an rooster,
Thet rooster shore could crow.
At four o'clock each mornin'
He'd shorely wake the dead,
I'd be coolin' out a winner
An wake up an be in bed.
Fer ten long years I farmed it
An I wish an wish agin,
Thet I had the hoppled pacer
Fer she had a chance to win.
But with me if's mighty different,
I'm outclassed all the way,
If the bugs don't eat the tafers,
The rain spoils all the hay.
The worms devour the cabbage,
The black rust kills the wheat
The pigs all git the cholera
I never see the beat.
I thot I'd milk a bunch of cows
To pay the grocery bill
The cream price it slid out of sight
I think it's slidin' still.
My wife she raised some turkeys.
Thet is she raised just one
The rest they all got lousy
An kicked off one by one.
An if I leave the place a day
Or sneak down to the track
The doggon cows bust in the corn
Thars hell when I git back.
The ration board they cut me down
To one Sears Roebuck tire
They hand me out a dozen cobs
To feed the furnace fire.
The only thing that ration board,
Don't ration out today
Is the way that hoppled pacer
Devours the oats an hay,
So when they told me buy a farm
An make a mint of cash,
I reckon they was kiddin me
Their judgment shore was rash.
In every race horse paper
I see most every day.
Where these same guys is racin'
An sleepin' in the hay,
When Fleming, Smart an Berry,
An ole Ben White an Short,
Are goin' down the ragin' grand
In the nat on's greatest sport,
I'll be out amongst the taters,
A toilin' in the sun,
A pullin' weeds an wishin'
I hadn't been so dumb.
