In The Sulky Forum

 

Gary, how much do you have to lose to get free parking that costs a few bucks?

I stayed in a suite at the Borgata in Atlantic City earlier this year with a friend who received free parking for both of us, the free suite for the evening, and a comped delicious meal at The Old Homestead.

My buddy got all the free stuff and spent several hours at the $200 minimum blackjack table. I believe he dropped $8,000 for the comps that were worth tons less.

I would prefer to pay.

I wouldn't handicap it

 

Arguing with a woman is like reading an app license agreement. In the end you ignore everything and click "I AGREE".

Isn't it scary to think that every bridge you drive across was constructed by the lowest bidder?

How is college like unprotected sex?
It's really fun until you get tested.

there's one more, but I'm afraid to write it..........

 

Potential Meadowlands Training Comments:

Race 1:  $10,000 claimers

1)    Horse doesn’t try and hasn’t since the day I got him. He doesn’t try in training, and doesn’t try while he’s racing, that’s why he’s in this class.

2)   Horse didn’t want to stand up and had to be dragged out of his stall. Only thing he did well this week was eat. He did win 2 years ago so he’s due.

3)   Horse jogged like crap this week but owner pays his bill and owner pays for shipping. I have nothing to lose.

4)   He won his last by 5 lengths and as long as I don’t race him against any horses with talent he can win as he doesn’t try, which he didn’t do training this week.

5)   Horse was turned out all week as he’s too sore to jog. We inject him 3 days before he races and hope he’s not in too much pain to win.

6)   Horse trained lights out this week. He’s never been better. Please claim him.

7)   Horse is basically obnoxious. The less time I spend with him the better. My second trainer jogged him as he always tries to kill me. He said he jogged OK. Any time we can get through the week with him and not get injured we’re happy.

   I woke up the horse at 5:00am and jogged him first every day. Horse has an extreme aversion to light, especially flashing light bulbs which accounts for his 2 for 132 record. He jogged, that’s it.

9)   Horse trained huge, clocked a mile in 1.54. All my horses train in 1.54. My stop watch is from 1967 and not always reliable.

10)   He’s the best horse in my barn which is why I need to change professions. He stinks and he shows it in every training mile.   


Race 2, Filly and Mares NW $5,000 last 5 or $12,500 claimers:

1)  She was a little better than awful this morning. She reared up and kicked when we tried to get her out of her stall, then she refused to pass any horse on the training track. The slower they went, the slower she went. She wants to be a broodmare but she's so awful nobody would want anything out of her.   

2)  She trained great. Ignore her 1 for 32 record this year. A once in a lifetime claim. I can't explain her 10th by 20 lengths in her last but she's bound to improve.

3)  Horse is afraid of flashing lights near the Winner's Circle, the whip, or lifting a hoof to pass any horse. Trained like shit.

4)  Mare continues to reinforce my wife's original comment that she was the worst investment I ever made while conveniently forgetting my engagement ring purchase.

5)  Much like you never know what to expect in a race from her, you never know what you'll get on the training track. Today she was good, yesterday she was horrible, I have no idea what you'll get on Saturday night. Isn't that why we call it gambling?   

6)  Mare is lame as all get out. I don't train her, the vet injects her. If she can walk onto the van Saturday afternoon, she'll be there.

7)  Couldn't get my driver and got someone who doesn't know where the Winner's Circle is located and decided not to train her. Watch him get her first over perfectly suited to her reverse gear in the stretch. Mare gives up as easily as a drunken cheerleader with no morals.

  Horse trained super. She always trains super. The problem is she never races like she trains.

9)  She didn't lift a hoof this morning and I think she's in heat. Just my luck, she's in heat and my girlfriend is sleeping with one of the grooms and doesn't think I know.

10)  I didn't train her this week as she drew the 10 post. She can't pace and try at the same time. I know she fits non winners of $5,000 but I always list the claiming price. A man can dream, can't he?



Race 3  Non-winners of $1,500 last 5 starts or a stale ham sandwich, also eligible $7,500 claimers:

1)   Horse swam but I was disappointed in his effort as I was hoping he would drown, will use weights next time.

2)   Trained in 2:02, it took him about 2 hours and 2 minutes to get him to break a sweat and jog a decent quarter mile.

3)   What effort do they have to give to actually call it training?

4)   Horse slept through jogging two miles and couldn’t go any slower. Can I pay $5,000 of the $7,500 to get someone to take him?

5)   He’s the best $7,500 claimer on the grounds, that’s how bad this class is. Is this something to be proud of?

6)   My guy can beat a car around the track provided the car won’t start.

7)   He’s primed for one of his best efforts. Is there a lower class than this one?

   He gave his best effort on the training track to do as little as possible.

9)   I asked him for his very best this morning and he substantially underwhelmed me.

10)   He stopped in the middle of his training and refused to pace. He excels in his lack of effort.